The Fetishization of Lesbian and Bisexual Women

There is a huge difference between acceptance and fetishization! Many people mistake the fetishization of lesbian and bisexual women by men for positive acceptance. However, the fetishization of these couples cause the women to be unable to have normal, private relationships or show public affection without getting unwanted and sometimes aggressive sexual attention from men.

This fetishization usually only includes femme lesbian couples; the more “masculine” queer women aren’t considered “hot” to these men.

Relationships between queer women are turned into something that men think they can control. Some men refuse to believe that the romantic relations between femme lesbians aren’t their property.

Many men try to take control of these femme relationships, thinking they can “change these women’s minds” and therefore deeming their relationships as illegitimate. Many are more likely to see femme lesbian couples as individuals going through a phase (if they don’t fit the butch stereotype, they aren’t legitimate). Some go as far as to comment on their relationships with remarks like: “they just haven’t been with the right man yet,” or “they just want attention from men,” once again thinking that these women’s relationships somehow involve them.

Overall, fetishization isn’t flattery, it’s exploitation. PLEASE let lesbian and bisexual couples have normal sexual and romantic relationships without involving yourself.